The Power of Questions: A Guide to Help Disciple Your Child

A poll was administered to 2000 parents which led to the non-astonishing fact that kids ask questions—lots of them. In fact, the average mom or dad face an average of 8 questions a month that leave themselves scratching their heads in wonder. Wonder that their child could come up with such a question, wonder how to answer, wonder what to answer! And it’s a good thing we have Google, because an average of 6 times per month, a parent will turn to Google to get an answer for their kids!

Questions are a part of growth. And if you are a parent, you can testify that that is true. As kids grow, they start questioning. But have we, as parents, used questions ourselves to help our kids grow? And can we use questions to help them grow spiritually?

An awesome study I would like to do sometime would be to highlight in my Bible the questions Jesus asked while He was still on earth. This has already been done, so I can share some statistics with you regarding His questions. Can you believe that Jesus asked 307 (or 305, depending on who did the research) questions to His followers and to the crowds around Him? Another cool part of this research was the fact that He was asked 183 questions—but He only answered 3 of them! Wow! Maybe that fact is true of any parent’s daily life! Just kidding. But really, we can learn some things from the Master Teacher.

If we were to take all 300+ questions Jesus asked, we could put them into one of four categories and make these assumptions:

1)      Jesus asked curiosity questions. About 80 of His questions where “how” and “why” questions. Of course, being omniscient, Jesus knew the answers to His questions—but the fact is, He still asked them.  It allows the one being asked the question to wrestle a bit with the truth and to come up with an answer or acknowledge that he doesn’t know.

2)      There weren’t too many questions that Jesus asked that you could answer with a “yes” or a “no.” He asked open-ended questions. Questions where you had to wait to get a full reply. Questions that would take time to listen to. Oh, listen to. Jesus took the time to listen to the answers to His open-ended questions—and it also led to further discussions.

3)      To do anything of significance requires significant challenges. Jesus uses challenging questions to grow His disciples-including us. Questions like “Will you really lay down your life for me?” and “What good is it for a man to gain the whole world but forfeit his soul?”  Belief is one thing, to follow is another. Jesus challenges us to follow Him with questions.

4)      We ask a lot of “when” questions. We are limited to time and space so “when” comes up a lot in our questioning. “When will I meet my spouse?” “When will I get my dream job?” “When will my children come back to God?” “When will Jesus come back?” Did you know that Jesus never, ever asked a when question with the emphasis on being a time-oriented answer? I like how Zach Zehnder puts it, “The more you have certainty and confidence in who Jesus is and the promises He declared, the less critical our “when” questions are.”  We tend to worry when we don’t know “when”. But trusting in who Jesus is and that His promises are real, will eliminate (or at least diminish) our need to know “when.”

So, using Jesus’ example in teaching His disciples and followers to grow, how can we as parents use questions to disciple (to grow) our kids in their spiritual faith? Here is one fun way that I found that can turn a family meal into a meal of questions and answers and spiritual discussions. Supposedly you can sign up for a free printable with these questions on it at https://www.growingkidsforthekingdom.com/20-questions-get-kids-thinking-jesus/  and if you do, it might make it easier to do this at home. Cut up the following 20 spiritual questions, put them in a jar, and at a family meal (or in the car) pull a question out and ask your kids these questions. For sure they will spark some discussions that you can use as discipling tools.

If you could travel back to Bible times, what story would you want to see?

If Jesus came to spend the day with you, what would you choose to do with Him?

Which fruit of the Spirit is easiest for you to practice and why?

Which fruit of the Spirit is hardest for you to practice and why?

What friend or family member do you hope believes in Jesus one day?

What is your favorite way to worship God?

What is your favorite Bible story?

If you could ask Jesus any question, what would that be?

When you get to Heaven and see Jesus, how will you greet Him?

What is your favorite Christian song and why?

Who are you most looking forward to meeting or seeing again in Heaven?

If someone asked you how to get to Heaven, what would you say?

What miracle would you like to see Jesus do?

What is your favorite thing about Jesus?

What do you think Jesus thinks about you?

What is your favorite gift or talent and how can you use it to bring God glory?

What is your biggest prayer request right now?

What is a struggle for you and how do you need God’s help?

What is something you can do to share the love of Jesus with someone?

What is your favorite way to spend time with God and learn about Him?

One last thought. Don’t forget to really listen to the answers!

Shari Coelho

Children’s Ministry Director